The hard choice we have to make

Well today I have to make a choice, I have two choices and from them I have to choose one. I don’t know why it came down to this but somehow at times you have to make a decision so that you can live peacefully. It does not mean that you are choosing one and ditching other but it means at the present time this is the best for me and other is not right. Well my head say something and heart is saying something else, and as far as I am concerned in the battle of heart and mind I could not decide.

Let me tell you why I am feeling like this today, I have to make choice to purchase a book but my biggest problem is I have to choose between paperback and Ebook. Since last 6 month I have started using kindle of Amazon and too be frank it has been really good in term of my liking because I am purist from my heart. I always preferred book in my hand to read but lately I have been shifting to eBooks and especially on Kindle either on my laptop or on my phone. It offered me the flexibility of reading any where I want to, from metro to bus, from office to train and I don’t have to carry anything extra in term of book or bag. It is always on my Gadget. If you add more on it, it is less costly then paperback. 

But do eBook will ever be able to replace the paperback, I am not sure. Paperback book has its own charm, it bring the feeling of holding book on your hand, sharing books with your friends, you gift it to other and rent it back from them. For me it was always the best part to read but once I start to look back and realize that does it need to be, does it make any difference either I read a book on my laptop or my phone or it is a paperback book. Another argument that make your heart more torn is paperback kills plant, even though I am not that environmental friendly but still it gives you heart more problem to decide.

For me choice is difficult, and I am not sure what I will decide, if any of you can help to make a right choice that will be great, because I am not sure what I will decide. But one this is for sure I will keep reading books either it is on kindle or paperback.   

How do you keep friends??

Every since I have started to write, I always thought about to write this but was never sure what to write about. They have been most important part of life; I have lived few of the best time of life with them. But still I didn’t get enough of them. 

 Some of us always dream of getting best friends, some of try to make them and only some luck champ get them without trying. I am one of them; I got my few best friends in life without trying. There was no such thing like we hit it from the first day, but we lasted the most. There have been good time, bad time and yes some dreadful days as well. But we kept going, lots of time we question each other, fights are hard to remember but yes we had arguments in life but we still keep out thought together. 

But one thing I always wanted to know how you keep your friends happy, You keep calling them, you keep meeting them, you keep them always thinking what to do, texting them. But do you really need to keep your best friends happy. I am not sure, because I have not done that. They call me up but I don’t call them back, they text me but I avoid them. But what kept us friends. I have no answer; I have ditched them most of time when they call me for some urgent work.  Still they hate me for this fact that they are my friends.

I remember one of teachers asked us, How many friend do you have?.

One student replied back sir I am friend with whole class. I also thought so about him because he used to talk to all of them. But sir asked him two more questions,

 “Do you know all about them, and they also know all about you?”. He was stunned with this question and replied with a big NO.

“Only one person knows about me all the things and I also know about him”.

“So, only he is your best friend dear. You can’t say friend to all of those whom you don’t trust”.

That day, I realized you don’t make friends for just name sake. You trust them with things in your life which you don’t share with you family also. I have been away from my family for almost 3 years and I know the importance of friend now more than any other time. But I never supported the thought of making friend just sake of getting benefit out of them. Either I am friend with you or not, I never hid my emotion in that front and never will, because that what I believe in life.

I know some people who believe in friendship which are just for work, they will call, tell you thing and try to talk to you when they see the need of it. You are for them a profit loss balance sheet, they will only give you call if they feel you are profitable for them. Thank god I have fewer friends like that, but still I have few in the list who fall in this category. Life is strange, you often tell the things to person who you believe but if they don’t send you details then what you will do. Often it is painful, and breaks of heart.

I, Me and totally myself

Lately I have missed writing on my blog regularly in my life. There has not been any specific reason but somehow I could now find any motivation to write. The reason have dried up, topics are not coming in my mind, could not find time in my life to write and list will go on. I could not find any one specific reason because of which I could not write these days. Slowly I am coming to term with the notion that you could not write at will, there will be time in your life when you could not write even thought how much you want to put your head in it. 

So what I did for last few month in life, which is quite big question when I look back at my life from January. To be short I have put my whole focus in last few month on my professional life, I have put more focus, more energy and more thoughts to get my priority right. I have become more familiar with number which has helped me to understand deep analytics of anything, I am able to handle my time better and also the goal which I have to achieve, it is all down to the fact that I have been putting extra effort in this thing, I have become so much more calculative in so many thing to make sure that I get used to thing which I want to do. When I see myself today I see a drastic change in me from last year. I am more open to other criticism (Now I take them in +ve way), I am more open to agree that I am wrong on certain term, I have become less argumentative and try to accept the fact that I could be wrong at time. But there has been another side of coin in this story which I am writing below.

As I have put more focus on my professional life, because of that my personal life has been out of order in last few months. Start with missing my best friend wedding, even though she has forgiven me but I know it could have been different. I could have been in her marriage but that is part and parcel of life we live in. If I see today, I am giving less time to my friend, family and people who care about me in real term. They always have been my side no matter what I have done but for how long they can bear me that is question to me. I miss the fact that it could have been so much different if I could have spend some more good time with them, this if is the factor which always create so many regret in life. We often think about time which we could have behaved or acted differently but does that could have changed the outcome. 

I don’t know what is coming in next few months in my life; I am trying very hard to maintain the bal. of personal and professional life. May be finally I will strike the right note and will get the best out of me in both the world.