Sports book to read: MONEYBALL

This is one of those books which I picked up after watching the movie “Moneyball”, and it was really a different book for me. Even though I don’t understand basics about baseball, still this book appealed to me very much. This was story of Billy, a man who has found a very interesting way to keep getting players who are really underrated and undervalued in the high valued league of MLB. He has his own scientific way to do that, and yes it was successful one. One thought that remain with you even when finished the book is, “In my life I only did one thing for Money, after that I promised myself that I would never ever do anything for money”, that thing he demonstrated by refusing red sox offer of being highest paid manager in the history of MLB, but he choose to stay true to his values, and even today he is fighting in the unfair world with his own method.

So what is his method all about, In MLB every team has his own budget, not all team can offered best player with best salary. So they have to pic player from lower league to get best value in them. Old school though is to just see if boy has talent or not, but Billy scientific approach led us to a system where are not picked on the talent alone, but also by the attribute on basis on which they affect the game in the most positive pay. It was totally statistically method, where everything has a proof and data, It was not on the gut feeling. His journey seems amazing as he was one of few people in the baseball who have played the game and now managing it as well. That is why he understands it is not always talent which counts to build a team, team is build from right group and right person in the mix, talent can just add to the ingredient of the team.

He was creating a team with the kind of budget, he has was really always amazed people. how they are able to do it against all odds, when other are failing to do it with bid budget. It is one of few good stories in the sports which people like to follow on; people will follow this story and always hope that this team will win. Sometime it is not always about winning but creating something which will have much more deeper impact on the sports. Billy found a way in this unfair world of MLB where he can outsmart other, his way might not be perfect way but he still did it. First time people call it luck, next time a sheer by chance but next time it was a well oiled method which helped them to put together what they can’t afforded. He looked some of the thing which others ignore in the player, and being a cricket fan I can understand that only hitting runs don’t always help, but if player can do lots of thing in a game with fielding, wicket then his value might be less, but chance of him affecting game is higher.

Billy proved one thing to others, it is not always what we already do is the right thing. There is always some way in which we can improve. May be his method might fail one day, but till then we have a great story to read.

P.S.: BTW I was New York Yankees fan, but now I am fan of this team as well. Even though I know in every two year time we will lose our all stars player. 

Just feeling don’t know what

I have been running away from so many things in life for last few months, it is not possible to overlook all of them, but yes I admit to make mistakes. But my problem is being not able to say that, hands up I made mistake. For that part I have paid some heavy price in past and for some portion I am paying still. I never figure it out how human emotions work, why people feel bad for something which is not directly related to them but that is life, you never need to understand who shit of it, you just have to live and move on in life.

There has been a big dilemma in my mind in last few months, about being social or really not being social. My initial though about being social is great, but when you have to really do that thing, I am really bad at it. Meeting with people, keeping up to date, keeping all the social meeting and dates, I suck at all. For the once I agree with most of them that I am really most annoying person at these things, I give all the commitment and still end up not doing the same thing. I don’t what that is for, maybe I don’t want to do that or I am really afraid of doing new thing. I don’t, because I am not able to figure it out. It is very simple thing someone told me, you have to just decide about what to do and what not do, and tell straight people this is done and this is not, but practically I have failed to do that. I tried that one or two time but it ended in disaster.

The thing I regret doing in last few month is just hurting some friends, whom I should not have hurt. I know they all think of me a great deal, they will call me back once they go thought this face of emotional hurt from me, but then again I might hurt them. I never really want to do that, but I happen to me every other time. I choose to do thing which I feel is better of everyone, but something I could not convey that thing across the table, and my biggest let down has been this thing. It hurt people; they are hurt more by my silence rather than by my words.

I don’t know how to fix things, maybe with time I will learn that, for time being I am trying to make everything normal for me. When I look back today I realize how much things has been in mess because of my own behavior rather than because of others. For me things are always the same, I might not change the time, but somehow I might change the situation.

The happy part for me is that I am trying to solve all the things without fuss, I am happy people are upset with me, because they are upset of love and affection they have for me, maybe one day I will make everything normal, till that time I have to keep trying. 

The books I want to read in Holidays

For last 6 month there has been huge drought of books in my life, the only book which I have read is the blue ocean, recommended to me by my boss Mr. Sankalp, the movement you start reading that book it hook you up because you want to know how it is done, but it will only interest you if you love to read business book or motivational book. After that, though I bought some books, I could not finish them off. I have been slow reader of late because of my busy schedule. I tried kindle as well, but very soon I realized that I am not the guy who can read book on the kindle. I like to feel the book on the hand, and try to keep book with me for a long time.

Last few days I was searching for some good books to read, so here I come up with the list of few books which I want to read in next 30 days, those books I have chosen on the base of my interest at this time, it might change by the time I want to read that book, but still I want to read these book anyhow.

It started with a friend request: This book is third book of Sudeep, I read his first and second book both. Well first book was really a great read from him, but his second book was a letdown for me. This book I want to read to see has he made improvement or he is just going on the same route of writing, Story to me looks promising, but still you can’t say anything about it till the time you finish it. I don’t prefer to read the review of books before reading because it spoils your mood and let you know what to expect from book.

Because Shit happens : I have already purchased this book, but the problem is this book is now with my sister, so I have to wait till I reach home in Eid Ul adha to get book from her. This book made the list simply because it is based on the startup experience of writer. He has already written a good triology of his love story based on Kanav. This is something which you don’t find Indian author trying, because it is different genre to which he usually write. But I expect him to do justice with the book, because his witt can match the balance between serious topics without being boring.

My life My rule: I came to see book which I was watching some other book of publisher online, but this book attracted to me. Maybe initially title got me, but when I read about book it made on my list, simply because it is about the 20 people who had option of doing something else but they choose to do thing which they like. This is book which I think everyone should read while they are in college, in office or even staying at home, because this will inspire you. There is story of harsha Bhogle a IIM A alumnus and he choose something which he love, and 19 other people story like this. I am looking forward to order thins book and read it.

After finalizing these three books, there is still one slot available for book which I can read on next 30 day. I anyone has any good suggestion do suggest me. You can check on left hand side my good read widget the books which I have already read. I am always open for good books suggestion.

The set of rule for Boys and set of rule for girls

I am not writing this post to prove anything, but I feel show how deep in our heart we have become so in human and unkind toward the one who has given us birth, who is our sister and who could be our wife, that we don’t treat them as a human. I want to Just take a example by X as a boy and Y as a girl, to prove my point, I am not giving them any name, because if I give them name people will find religion, they will find motive in my blog, they will either treat me a supporter of X religion or Y religion. I don’t want that, I want people to understand one point, that we all are same then why rules are different.

Story: X is a boy and Y is a girl, they both study in the same college and in same class. After 2 years they fall in love, they love each other very much. They never talked about anything till the time they get passed out from college. But the problem start from here, boy is from Different religion and girl is from religion, they both decide to get married no matter what happen. But before that they want to talk to their family one time. So X and Y both tell their family about their love. So here what happens in both the family, first let’s look at boy’s family.

X family reaction: He is the only child in his family, so everyone in family loves him. When they came to know about his love, they disagree, they tell him to marry in someone from their religion, but the boy was stand on his point to marry Y, then family member ask from other people what to do. Here come the religious leader and other society member, they first also try to force matter with X, but they knew it will not be possible to him to make him agree on their point. So they discuss with family member that it is fine if he marry with girl, because after all girl will marry and come in their home. So she has to follow their home rule. X also told to get Y agree on this point.  But the main point here is the people are angry with him but they are not forcing the matter with him as they know he is boy.

Let’s see what the scene in the girl’s family is

Y family reaction: The movements Y tell in her family about her love for X, it creates a big scene; people start to blame her study for this situation. Some blame her mother and some his father for her this decision. They start tell them that give freedom to your daughter this is what she will do, bring bad name to family. The next suggestion will be to get her married in the religion asap before things go out of hand. The girl will be told by her family emotionally how she has to behave because there are younger sister to her, which will not get married if she does this. Religious leader and other will give him the religion and other thing count how it is wrong to get married to other religion boy, and they will not accept this. They will try to force no matter what happens because this will become matter of their pride. Poor girl what wrong she has done?

I don’t know what will happen after this, but in 95% case they not get married. Because there is too much complication involved in it, but the kind of reaction girl face and the boy face is quite different. We don’t have the courage to tell the people what is wrong and right. But people have always done that with girl, they try to tell them what is right and what is wrong for them and also for their family. Why it is always girl who has to follow everything, but the bigger point is, when we such deep rooted biased in our system them how we can expect to give the equal right to the girls so easily. People don’t realize that change doesn’t come by law or by force, but it comes when you start practicing the right thing in a right way.

P.S.: I have really big problem to the people who take side with the religion basis, Right does not become wrong by religion. So don’t try to find religion everywhere, try to find some love also.

The difference in prospective

When I was in class 10^th our group decided that we will join the same school for our 11^th class, because our school was only till 10^th. But when result came out of our 10^th class we hardly knew who would be going to which school. I am talking about a time where there was no facebook and phone. So communication part was more different then what it is today. I choose to go Air force School Bamrauli for my further schooling in commerce. I could not take science because my chemistry and biology was terrible. But it was right decision for me.

When I joined my new school, it felt lonely for first few days. Everyone in my class knew each other apart from few new students. I could not see myself getting along with them anymore. I used to my time in my earlier school; I have spend my 10 year in that school with my old friends. It was hard for me to forget all things in one go and start from fresh. I was not prepared for that time; I was not mature enough to think about that. I wanted to get in the same school as my friends where, but I could not. Some school I could not get register and rest didn’t give me admission. That was really a low time of my life; I don’t know what to do. I see others happy and yet I was not, I always after 10^th life will be easier but there I was feeling worse than any other time. 

I thought about doing lots of things at that time, I never told anyone or talked to anyone about that period of my life. Because that was the low time which I don’t want to look back. I always want to remember only good things about life. New school, new people and you feel terrible. So what changed in me in next few days that changed my life? 

When you really need a inspiration about something, you find it everywhere, but I was looking for was someone to tell me how to get out of my past to look forward to the future. It came from a book, I don’t remember the book name, but there was one letter of I think Benjamin Franklin to his son who he just send in the hostel for schooling. He wrote him about how he should treat other and his life to get best out of it. And it was simple but yet so powerful letter, it moved me fully. It changed me how I see things since then, till then I was not very much open to new things but after that it was totally new things.

He written in letter how it is important to embrace the present with open arms in order to make you future better, make new friends, talk with everyone, try to reach everyone out there and learn from them. It helped me a lot, ever I feel confused or need some motivation just I read that letter again. You need words of other sometime to show you the path that you know is write but still you prefer someone else world to be more sure about it. 

After that my school life become much easier, I made lots of friends in the school time. Today when I look back I have better memory of my second school then first because I have let go lots of thing to embrace the new things. I am glad I did it, may god give me more such memorable journey to live in this life.

The Eid as I remember

Back in the days when grandmother, was alive, Eid used to be something else. Come morning all us cousins, aunts and uncles would head to her house. The older cousins were dressed to the nines, the aunts wore kitchen friendly clothes and soon the delicious aroma of a million things cooking on the stove pushed out any sadness.

The fest started at breakfast.

I remember my Mom and khalas, together in the kitchen, cooking together gossiping about those not present. Oh! The things they would find scandalous. Someone’s son had started smoking, someone else had been caught lying and a kid was actually sleeping in until – gasp – 12 o’ clock!
The talked and laughed and cooked non-stop.

At times we were given lemons to squeeze, onions to peel and garlic to crush. But even if you had a chore, you were not welcome in the kitchen and definitely not encouraged to eavesdrop on grown up conversation. So, we kids mostly stayed out in the garden, playing Chupan Chupai, Carrom and putting on a quiz show using raw guavas with sticks in them as a the mics. We raced each other up the fig tree and jumped on the roof till someone told us to keep it down. Once a cousin was dared to jump from the roof, he wouldn’t and then someone told him he would do it.

The things we did. A lifetime ago.

Everyone has gone out in the world and has made a place for themselves, but in making that place, we’ve all moved very far from the place we belonged to. On Eid days now, I am at home only to celebrate the Eid, but is not the same. I know that now there are no one who will call me up for the Eid Namaz or wait for me to get ready, because I usually get ready at last in house. There is no happiness of wearing the no cloths. “Hey, what is the point of making an effort when nobody is coming for Eid?”

The compulsory house calls of Eid’s of the lore have simply become phone calls now. I call cousins and laugh over the same stories we’ve laughed at a million times before. We remember the grand times we had and wonder when we’ll all gather back in the same roof at some time.

By mid-day the calls are over and done with. So Eid passes, simply as an off day and not as one of the most perfect days of the year. Every year, I find myself going back to the Eids of my childhood and every year they become a little more perfect, a little more fantasy-like. I miss the company, the feeling of being young, happy and having an eternity to spend, but most of all, I miss the tradition.

Note: This is someone else thought, which I just used

Friendship day

When I was in school, there was no one who used to celebrate this day, until we saw kuch kuch hota hai. That was the first time I was introduced to the Friendship day and friendship band. All the boys used to dream about giving friendship band to the girls, because giving band to boys was such a waste. Some of us succeeded in making few friends especially, rest of kept thinking about how to approach the girls. A boy and girls can never be only friends that was we used to thing at that time, We all feared what if girl refuse and more dangerous what if she make us his brother. That was too much risk at that time. 

Those were days when there was no facebook, no orkut, no twitter, no mobile phone and even having landline phone was rare. If you receive a call from girl then it become a big news in your home, your cousins and sister will remind you that thing till the time then find someone new to target. Talking to girl used to be a taboo in school until and unless you are famous with your looks. I remember how in our group of boys we used to tease the boy who talks to girl, and more he used to think as traitor in our group. We were all small town boys, who were very much influenced by the movie. We all were Srk type lover, we wanted to woo the girl with all the good things but in reality we knew it is not possible. 

Today when I look back to those days, it really becomes so nostalgic to think about those days. My school time was more memorable because I am still in touch with most people of my school whom I consider as my friends, but when I look back I have some regrets as well. But we all move on in our life, we make new friends. One thing I learned in school which was really important to me was making new friends is very important, you need to meet people and talk to them in order to know them.

On this friendship day I want to remember all my school friends who made me feel so special, who knew me when I was nothing and they believe me at that time also. I want to meet all of them all the time, but I know it is not possible but we all can hope. I still think your school friends are the one who know about you most but don’t talk about you. They can judge you best because they know you when you have learned to lie about yourself, you don’t fake yourself, and you don’t make things to become friends. Some time you think how well your school days where. 

Anyways, this friendship day I am not doing anything special apart from doing what I do best, hoping some of old friends call me to talk with me.

little loyalty left in me

I have to admit, it is strange to me to write about this. Actually I was just going through some old memories just when I came face to face with an unwanted memory which was hidden somewhere in my mind. It was somewhere backing around 12 standards; it was said by my close friend to me. After 10^th we never meet, but once we did at that time it was strange talking to each other. We both wanted to get into same school, but it didn’t happen and I blamed him for that. But he said to me, if you wanted it so much what you did for it, I never thought about it. What did I do?

It was never about the friendship, it was about the time I spend with him and I wanted him to choose me over others, and that was the problem. I expected him to be loyal, but I have made the easy choice. I blamed him and never thought about it, I am glad he said that to me, because after that I never blamed him. It was all about me and I accepted that. 

I am not the loyal person, I am admitting that, but somehow after that I developed the habit of loving the people who have given me something in life. If I love you, I will show it, but I need to be loved by you, that are the condition. 

Today when I see around me, we all take each other too much granted and also we are not any more loyal to each other. We do anything for our gain and other loss, either it is in friendship or in work, it is all about profit and loss statement to us. We have to maintain it by taking all the necessary steps, if it still not matched create some misc item to get it done. Emotions don’t stand a chance to get in between the things we do.

Loyalty is the word which is only used when you are expecting something in return for someone, but if you are in other place then you would also ditch the loyalty. That is the reality and we have to accept it. I just heard this dialog somewhere, “If you are week you can’t forgive someone, for that you have to be powerful.”

P.S. leave the "loyalty" this word is out of fashion today, maybe we all will remember it once we in retirement. 

Emotionally confused

What I should write today, I am not sure. When I opened my laptop today, I had 1000 of thought in mind to write about, but there is one very strong emotion in my mind which I want to truly express, how it is like to be live away from your family?

What I feel like at this movement of time if I describe it, I feel like emotionally missing something in life, a backbone of your life which is supported by your mom, a movement of joy which is provided by your sister, a movement of smile which we all share on small joke, a movement of emotion which we can share with our grand parent. I feel like missing that thing in my life. I know people always had to be emotionally very strong to do something in life, you have sacrifice so much in life, then someday you become what you want to become but at what cost?

In economics I read a concept called “Opportunity cost”, it define how any action or activity you do in life or business it has a cost which you ignore to choose the current one. For example I am living here in Delhi with my friends for my job, so I have the opportunity cost of living in home with my family. It gives me an idea how we have changes so much in life for the things which might not be needed in the end by us at all. Generally I don’t like to give into my blog about my what I am thing inside my mind about emotions but today is exception, I will tell what I am thing right now.

As I talked with my mom today, I feel like they have all the things in life and in my home. But they don’t have anyone over there to help them and take use of it. like in my home there is car standing in the garage but no one is there to drive it, my dad don’t drive it and I am here in Delhi. It makes me confuse about the way I should be living my life, I should be here or there with them. I have made a decision and now I am living with it, but there will be a day when I will be back with them very soon. I don’t want to live my life full of regret, as I have till now. I will do what is right at that no matter what my future will hold for me. 

In out today culture what we ignore most is our family; we always take them for granted. Mom, dad and sisters we always thing they will be on my side no matter what happens. Especially me I am unable to show my emotions to them, because while growing up I was always told mans today cry. But often I feel like crying by putting my head on my mom lap, and he just put his hand on my head. I just wanted to talk to him so much but not on phone, I wanted to eat so much of good food from my sister hand, but as it said rightly, “Har kisi ko mukmaal jahan nahi milta, kisi ko jameen aur kisi ko asmaan nahi milta”..

 I am emotionally confused today, maybe tomorrow I will be normal and better but till then I am missing everything in life.. L