Main aisa kyu ho

What I really want to be in my life? Well this is the question which I have been asking from myself since I was in class 3 but there have been no answer. I get only more confusion and with more question. Let me tell you about this confusing story.

When I was kid in the class 3^rd, I was so impressed with my one teacher that I only wanted to be teacher. For me at that age it was the best profession, you don’t have to take care of anything except teaching and you have the power of pass and fail any student in the subject. For me that was one of the most powerful jobs. I liked my teacher more than the job I realized later. But after few years I realized I could not teach those shouting kids in school and I have to look for new profession for myself…

At that time there was one anuty in my mom office, her son was selected for the MBBS. My mom always wants us to be something like doctor. At that time in 6^th class I pushed for the science, I tried to learn how to draw diagram of difficult insect and also the most difficult thing in biology spelling and scientific name of all the tree, animal and human being. Slowly I realized that this science is not the subject for me. Well the best incident I had at that time was when my science teacher enters in the exam room and gives us brief on the errors in the paper of chemistry. I could not understand what the original mistake in the chemical equation was. Well before even passing my 10^th exam I announced in my home, “I am done with science, I will going to go for commerce”.

Well that decision do changed my life quite a bit. Now I can’t be engineer, doctor and even scientist (Well that last one was not even in my consideration).

In between one day between my 10^th exam and 11^th admission I went with my mom in one of cousin weddings. There one of my uncle met to him and he was more interested in my career that any other thing.

“So saifi what you have decide to do in life”, my uncle asked me.

“Well uncle, I have decided to join commerce and let see after that I have not deiced anything”. I replied to him. But his next question was more difficult for me to explain. He asked, “So, you will engineer or doctor. You know Mr. Khan sahib daughter is now joining MBBS. I hope you make us proud us also”.

Well I don’t know how to answer that question, more so I don’t want to explain him that what diff. between commerce and science was. So I replied, “Let’s see uncle”. After reaching home I decide to never go to mom parties.

I was sure about my next step of joining commerce in 11^th, but somehow there is also some twist like it has been in my whole life. That I will explain in next part.